I'm in a rather thoughtful mood today. I received an email from my daughter who has been having a bit of a rough time with her significant other. This seems to be an ongoing thing and not something new. She has always said to me, "but it didn't used to be this way". And the queery to a mom of what should I do generally follows.
I often think of life like driving a car. You have to turn on the ignition and get ready to go. You have to put yourself into gear...no one can do that for you nor can you go forward without doing so. Now, you have to put your foot on the gas pedal...take those steps forward. Of course, you have to steer and choose your own path. Where are you looking? Forward..towards the next turn or the bend that may be coming up in the road. Then there's that rearview mirror. It's a checkpoint to see where you've been. Occasionally, you look back to see what may be coming or where you've been but it isn't what you stare at as you drive.
Way too often, we spend time looking backwards in our rearview mirrors at what was or should have been instead of taking charge and driving forward through all the curves and bends in our paths. We're the ones that are driving...taking those steps forward. It's okay to look in the rearview mirror to check where you've been and learn from the mistakes. If we don't look through the front windshield, we'll be slamming on the brakes, swerving and having a very unpleasant ride.
So my advice to her? Stop looking in her rearview mirror, start to take charge and drive. Are you using your rearview mirror too much?